Tao Te Ching 20

Stop thinking, and end your problems.
What difference between yes and no?
What difference between success and failure.
Must you value what others value, avoid what other avoid?
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So much of our thinking isn’t our own – it’s been borrowed, or foisted upon us. Parents, church, school, friends, fellow partisans, the media, employers – all provide the materials from which so much of our thinking is assembled. It’s a wild mosaic, constructed of shards of this and that.

As a result, we too often value the things that others value and devalue what others devalue. We believe that we’re values-driven, when we actually fluctuate between being values-light and value-less – at least in terms of possessing values that we can truly call our own.

In his song, “You’re Only Human”, Billy Joel reminds us:

You're only human; you're allowed to make your share of mistakes;
You're not the only one who's made mistake;
But they're the only thing that you can truly call your own

Ironically, our mistakes are often the last thing that we’re willing to call our own; we’re fond of attributing them to others.

The Tao Te Ching invites us to reclaim a set of values that are eternal and veritable. We do so by quieting our mind’s incessant pursuit of “yes” and “no” and “success” and “failure”, and all the other dualisms that we believe make up our values. As the dirt in the water settles, clarity reemerges and reveals a set of values that have been inherent in our nature since the day we were born.

We rediscover who we are. We rediscover reality. We begin to value life on its terms, rather than in accordance with the terms and conditions of the social contract we’ve entered into with so many others over so many years. In so doing, we find peace and freedom and in that peace and freedom we bless the lives of others in ways that we’ve never done before.