Tao Te Ching 32

When you have names and forms, know that they are provisional. When you have institutions, know where their functions should end.

Knowing when to stop, you can avoid any danger.
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Remember when mom or dad would tell us, “You went too far. You need to learn when to stop.” We’ve probably said the same thing to our children.

Eastern philosophy invites us to stop putting names and labels on people, places and things or at least to realize that any label is conventional and provisional, at best. But, our need to label is strong because it’s the only thing that makes us right and others wrong; that makes us good and others bad. After all, if others aren’t wrong and bad, then how are we to know that we’re right and good? Without our goodness, what separate us from the bad guys? Being right feels good to us. It feeds our ever-hungry ego.

Our collective ego, in forms such as religious denominations and political parties, also demands separation and a “house divided”. We profess the need for such institutions, but we cannot seem to define where their functions start or stop. We declare our cherished institutions to be “true”, but in doing so we strip away the boundaries for their roles in our lives while failing to see that such a declaration is just another label when it’s applied to any group of people, ideology or belief system.

In a self-constructed world of institutions that are right and wrong and good and bad, violent conflict between competing truths is inevitable and fills our world with danger. We keep going too far. We don’t know when to stop.

We owe our moms and dads an apology for not listening. We owe our children an apology for not practicing what we preach. Now would be a good time to stop.